My cell phone just went through the spin cycle. I'm waiting for it to dry to see if it turns back on, but I'm 99% sure that even if it manages to power up, it will be like Jack Nicholson at the end of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. I will have to do my dutiful role and smother it with a pillow, and find something large to throw through the window.

If you could please resend me your cell phone numbers, I would appreciate it. It will facilitate the education of the new cell phone, when I manage to purchase one.

At least it smells nice.