HOW TO SUBMIT
Should there be more issues of the Symposium, I'd still like to get submissions from everyone out there. If it's a story or a poem, then you send them to:

(removed)

If it is artwork, please e-mail me with a description of the artwork and I'll send you my address.
Don't be shy and please send me your works

I feel sort of weird, cos all I'm drawing now is graffiti. I mean it's cool, but I also miss drawing regular pictures like before. With the graffiti, it is so simple and looks cool, but does not require too much thought . . . well it's like it doesn't wake up the bad parts of my brain, that would bother me when I drew reg pictures. It is very low-risk. But I feel I want to reg draw again. It's hard though. The thoughts bother me. It's like my self critic side is awake and so is the part that makes it very hard to make decisions. There aren't that many decisions in graffiti, but in regular drawing, there is part of me that keeps sort of "suggesting" lots of diff things and makes me not want to pick or accept a certain line, curve or picture because its not perfect.

Now I see how this connects to my photos! The whole thing about I'm not perfect. So I'm starting to feel better because I remember how I'm sort of O.K. w/ that, but then I thought of drawing and keeping this in mind and I'd be content and able to draw, but the drawings wouldn't give me that huge "high" every once in a while. Well in this new mindstate I'll get that high whenever every once in a while I draw a really rad picture like I did in the old mindstate, but the difference is that all the pictures that had huge negative feelings before will have just content feelings now.

Maybe I'm uneasy cos I'll miss the romanticism of extreme feelings . . . good and bad.-

- Ben R

I'd like to thank all of you who are reading this in what very well could be the last issue of the Symposium Newsletter. I'd especially like to thank those of you who have been faithful supporters and readers through all of the Symposium's issues and years (even though the issues were few and far between).

This is possibly the last issue ever to be published and I really mean it when I say I'm sad to see it end. I truly enjoyed all the work that went into putting it out (the late nights of slaving in front of the computer and all the money sucked away by the Xerox machines at Kinko's). The gratification I received for all of this was measured not in money but in the smiles and compliments that I received from you my readers. And believe me, no matter how much you think you paid, I did not make any money off of this.

In this issue, I've collected all the stuff I've been given since last October, including a Christmas story meant for the "Christmas Issue" (I wonder what happened to that?) and I would like to heartily apologize to Louis and Chuck (since this is almost June and, last time a checked, Christmas was not in June). But it is a good story, so I have included it in this literary collection.

This issue could be the best issue put out due to the many different people who contributed. Unfortunately, a lot of the works are . . . dark and melancholy. For some reason, the majority of teenage poetry is very moribund and devoid of hope. Also, a lot of people have it in their little heads that the Symposium is about darkness. Now don't get me wrong, that's not necessarily bad. In fact, as many of you might have put together, some of my stuff has a tragic twist to it (mmmmm, tragic twists), but every now and then, a sunshine poem is not bad.

Well, I guess its time to say goodbye. Keep sending me your works (both literary and artistic). You can send them to Ken's account (kbohlin@idsonline.com no longer exists!) or my new account at (removed). Also, keep checking the website (now at www.geocities.com/Area51/Corridor/1979) for announcements. It's been great fun and although I won't necessarily miss high school as a whole, there are parts that I will miss . . . doing the Symposium is certainly one of them.

Thank you all very much for your compliments and may the Goddess (or whomever you believe in) bless you all . . . goodbye.

Your ever grateful editor,

Kenji B